She slipped away from my hands and disappeared almost like a dream. At the edge of the cliff, I frantically search for a glimpse but I could see nothing. The wind roared into my ears rattling my soul like a toy. I gave up. I got up and stood at the edge of the cliff. […]
I wish I could go back in time, I wish I could reciprocate my feelings when I had a chance. I wish I could love you the way you loved me, I was a fool; I did not see it would end this way. I asked for another chance at life, Despite for the […]
Coming to my senses, finally things are clear, How could I be so stupid and wished I was a seer, Blinded in my love for you, Thought it was the same for you. How feeble is your love I see, So shallow and fake as thee. A woman in love is what you saw, […]
Let us give us a chance again in Love, Let us give each other a chance in Love somehow. Somewhere down the lane, we thought we held each other’s hand, However, in reality, we walked further away into some devious wonderland. A wonderland of deceit but beautiful creatures, Creatures that shaped to your heart’s […]
If only you could see my love, If only you could ease my pain. If only you could hold my tears, If only you could touch my soul. If only you could see what you do to my heart, If only you could understand what you, do to me. If only you could only […]
One Two Buckle my shoe Very early in the morning I felt an abrupt movement beside me. Muffled words slowly crept into my sleepy thoughts. It almost sounded like a lullaby. Then I heard Baby G say “Juju” ( aka milk) I pulled myself out of my bed with every last ounce of energy. If I am late, she would […]
War may sometimes be a necessary evil. But no matter how necessary, it is always an evil, never a good. We will not learn how to live together in peace by killing each other’s children ~ JIMMY CARTER The brutality and bloodshed, The earth remains the silent witness and has now turned red. People either […]
Little girls are the nicest things that happen to people. They are born with a little bit of angel shine about them, and though it wears thin sometimes there is always enough left to lasso your heart. . . — Alan Beck A year ago, my husband and I got a perfect gift. Our Baby […]
I see a silhouette, the curve of your chubby cheek, Your tiny hands reaching out whimpering in the night – poor child, I hold you closer humming a song and letting you know that its all right. My mind forever plays a thousand questions, Will you still come to me when you are a teen? […]
Just when I thought marriage brings the absolute change in life… A fragile, quivering, puppy-eyed bambina changed my perception … Suddenly everything revolves around this tiny, angelic being. Thoughts all gravitate towards her health, her sleep, her nutrition, her burps, the number of wet diapers in a day….the list goes endless. Waking up in the […]
I have heard that pregnant women crave for really weird things at odd hours and enjoy weird combinations which may sound even taboo to the others! Ask a husband who went through the “preggy” phase of life and you will be astonished as to what he experienced and his various marathon adventures. All I crave […]
I thank God for constantly changing my life and making it worth living every second. As we step into adulthood, we tend to appreciate life and see things in a very different perspective. I guess that is what we call growing up or growing old. What changed my life currently? The Thadathil family had a […]
Being the youngest of the family had its perks and fun. My parents were the nurturing ones literally. Even when I was 28, my dad used to iron my clothes for the next day and my mom prepared and packed my lunch as I rushed to work. My mom was my stylist who would shrug […]
A prayer I say – a word or two, Let these lips speak to please you. I may close my eyes and shed a tear, Lift me up and undo my fear. Your eyes so just and filled with love, You have love for me but how ?? You hold me up and raise my […]
Age to women is like kryptonite to Superman ~ Kathy Lette I will be turning 30 soon. I have read people make long lists on what they will do before they turn 30. I wish I could share the same enthusiasm but turning 30 is like swallowing a huge vitamin pill. Past few months, I could scarcely […]
My dearest friend, You will be embarking into a place where everything will be new and different. As you step into this world, there will be places which your feet can get wet, this is the time when your better half will carry you in his arms and take you across. Now you will have […]
She was just months when I held her in my arms for the first time. How time flies and now she is 1. Here is my letter to you Joann, once you begin to read and understand I know you would find this letter rather amusing. Dear Jo, I fell in love with you the […]
Your brother is always the first male friend you will have in your life. Nobody will ever be able to understand your craziness like your brother and although you don’t see each other as much as you’d like, he will always remain your friend and be there for you when you need him the most. While […]
“I told you everyday and showed you in a thousand ways, but you were too busy to listen…How loudly must I whisper before you hear Me ? ~ Chris M Hibbard ”
I have this phrase printed and kept right in front of me in my workplace.
It reminds me of a patient God who is waiting at the door for me to open my heart to him. a gentle God because I know he will be knocking at my door constantly with persistence. the Father who is willing to stay by my door to guard me from the dangers lurking beyond it….. as he waits for me to answer. my Father who would take His liberty to comfort me even though I haven’t called to him.
Even though I know all this, I can keep writing on and on about what God is for me and how He is there to wipe my tears away … I can start a whole new blog on this alone but questions lingered as I begun this post –
Why is that I keep doing these things I do ? Why is that I don’t open that door to Him ?
Why is that I keep my God waiting ? Why is it that writing all these things are easy and tough to follow ?
Even when I know I can hold on to Him, why is it that Satan never stops trying?
I know that the tone of this post took a total U-turn, but this is what we need to ponder upon I realized.
Words maybe the best thing to express ourselves but for God it is our actions and what we don’t say matters. Words play very less importance in our relationship with God. I am sure you have faced it when you begin to pray, you are left with no words but tears, but those tears bridge those gaps in your prayers.
I am not inferring that prayers are not necessary – prayers are what keeps us sane. But, what I am trying to point out is that our conversations with God must go way beyond our human talk. Our God is receptive to our emotions far more than we can imagine. Our emotions are like whispers to God.
I can imagine God whispering by even clanging all the bells of churches worldwide – will we hear Him ?
As I put this point out to all the readers, a thought goes to my God –
” Keep whispering Father, Keep Whispering… “
I used to spend copious amount of time just looking out of my window. Making stories of how I would meet the right one.
I come back to senses when I find my mom patting my shoulder asking me if I have listened to anything she said.
My mother tried to break my shell of seclusion and was worried about me.
She even questioned me if I had a best friend and I wondered what the hell that meant. Life was so less complicated before that.
This question lingered so much in my mind that I blurted it to my friend over the phone. She replied to it saying “It’s not something you should ask …”
I again found myself in a confusion asking myself now what the hell was that ?
Going from school to college, I learnt and went ahead with whole new hope and aspirations. Made friends with a whole new bunch of people but being a common friend between two enemies ( bad idea )
I found myself in different situations leading me to ask myself what shit am I in?
Surviving the emotional turmoil of adulthood, I go for my masters in Germany. I am in this foreign land with foreign people speaking a foreign language. I stand at the bus-stop in the middle of nowhere thinking where the hell I am??
A boy steals me of my thoughts, my brain refuses to work and I refuse to hear to my heart and ask myself over and over again,
Why the hell am I feeling this way?
In my life, I have had my share of confusions leading to reality-checks,
but it made me what I am today.
Life holds a lot of lessons – sometimes we get the privilege to learn from another person’s experience or we earn it the hard way
We take oaths during our wedding that we will stand by each other through sickness and in health and we enter into the life of matrimony.
This weekend, was a test of how far I could endure the part of “stand by each other through sickness “.
This can sound silly, but Men become high maintenance when they fall ill. It’s like they have all this demands, weird gruffs, puppy-like looks and endless requests.
Yes, my husband was not well – a tooth extraction plus a root canal. It may sound small or insignificant, trust me I did too but I was wrong.
Initially I didn’t really understand the true need of “being there for him”. I was just upset and angry with all his demands and it drove me crazzzeeee !!!!
There was a part where he called me just to re-fix the pillows under his head ( Can you beat that ! )
It took me a while to “suck it up, do what I am suppose to”.
I may not be a perfect wife who is dotting over the husband when he is ill but I have learnt my first lesson to bring out the best in me so that I can support him when he needs me.
This is what marriage is all about I realized and it took me almost a year to understand the true meaning of selfless commitment –
Reporter: ” Mr.Lungs I was looking for a story and thought I would write something about you. Would you help me with this ? “
Lungs: ” Sure, I think it is very important for youngsters to know about their body before “… *mumbling*
Reporter: ” Mr.Lungs, I dont understand what you are saying ” ….. ( i was immediately interrupted)
” I was young so filled with fresh air, every second I filled myself with so many scents. I could never be so alive and being a part of my family I am so grateful to be one of the most important member of that family. Miss.Heart always advised me to hold the air a bit longer as it would benefit all and I always listen to her. But Mr.Diaphragm whose ways I find bossy, due to the very reason that he pushes me up and down and…
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Usually I forget to be thankful for the lovely things I have been bestowed upon.
But this vacation is one thing, I am forever grateful to the Almighty above.
I was super excited for my vacation to India especially to meet my folks and the new angel which was gifted to our Thadathil family.
My anticipation to meet my niece exceeded so much that I kept replaying her video again and again until I can still hear her chatter in back of my head.
My arrival was supposed to be a surprise to my family but I would give the credit of destruction to my darling brother – who flopped the whole planning in a matter of seconds.
So, Lets fast forward the day of my brother’s arrival with his family.
I had all planned…
Taking a video of new grandparents meeting their grandchild for the first time;
The cries and laughs …….maybe a group hug…blah ..blah…
An epic sentimental movie I can make of it,so I thought.
But in reality,
the baby ended up being a victim of a tug of war
Bro and sis-in law being left out at the terminal…
(thank God nobody taped that mess) :S
Like all vacations, this one month vacation also ended very quickly and I only remember a few precious moments when I go through all the pictures and videos I have taken furiously.
Our house is a ancestral home of the Thadathil Clan…A quick tour into my world..
This veranda holds a lot of memories I have with my grandfather. Hence, this is the favorite part of my house which I will always hold closest to my heart.
Now my father thrones his “rightful place” in this chair – only reserved for him except for one small exception –
My parents are really into gardening and dad has made a huge “greenhouse” shelter for them. It is remarkable how much they dedicate their time and energy to these seasonal flowers which bloom and later fade gradually.
No matter how much and how long I will drink and eat my mother’s food , there are few things I will really miss – EVERGREEN
Mom’s Cup of Tea – It is everything like how my mother’s Love is : Energizing at the same time Comforting. It is something I would like to unwind myself along with a good novel.
Mom’s Payasam – (Why my dad in the picture ?)
The main reason associated with my liking towards payasam is the look my Dad has as he savors every spoon of his share of Payasam with ultimate indulgence in his eyes. The contentment in his face is just priceless.
In this month, we have evolved and played many new roles with the addition of a person in our family.
My parents into grandparents
My brother into a father ( Seriously !! )
Me into an Aunt
Now, I am no longer the youngest one in my family or the pampered one. But I am happy to give away my place to the one that followed me.
Thank you God for the little things and pleasures in life. Life would never be the same without your mercy.
Dear Sister, We cannot change what happened to you and we hold our head in shame the day your heart stopped beating. But when your heart stopped, it triggered many hearts in rhythm to fight for justice. We will never let your death be in vain ! It started as a regular day but filled […]