I waited patiently hoping that she would open the door and invite me into her house…into her heart. I just could not leave her… call me a loser in love but I just could not let her go…
…not just yet.
My friends would call me a fool with no self-respect especially since she had someone new in no time and it pained me how easy it was for her to forget me.
“Was I really nothing to her?”, I asked myself as I watched her by the window. She never shed a tear, she just moved on.
Next day, I followed her to her workplace. I stood and watched her sway her way and heard her high-pitched laughs when she joked with her friends. My core, which once tingled with this sound, now shattered my heart. I turned away blinking my tears and tried hard to mend my heart.
However, I just could not let her go. I was acting like an obsessed lunatic and followed her every step. I wanted her to see me but I would just duck away when she turned my way. I did not know what kind of life i was living now because all I could think of was getting her back.
I am slowly beginning to realize that things were not the same anymore. I seem invisible to everyone around me. My clothes were dirty and my hair felt greasy as I ran my fingers through them. Dogs barked at me aggressively and I am running aimlessly like a maniac.
Day by day, my mind turned cold towards her as I blamed her for the state I was in. I once had everything; I had a family but she pulled me away from them. I had friends, which she dissed so systematically.
“The only thing she loved was money”, I blurted.
This realization took me back to several months when we met for the first time at a wedding. She looked so innocent and I could not take my eyes off her. She played her part so well, how easily she controlled me and I felt like a fool all of a sudden.
My thoughts went to that night we parted, she was so cozy in my arms as we watched a movie.
“I will get us something to drink baby”, she whispered.
“Naah, I am fine just as we are now.” I replied holding her tight. My heart could not contain the love I had for her.
She pried away from my embrace and said she will be right back.
She came back with two glasses of champagne and a smile on the lips, which did not reach her eyes as it used to.
“Let’s celebrate this moment”, she said and made me gulp down the champagne.
I did not remember what happened to me after that. My thoughts were interrupted with a leaflet, which flew to my direction.
It looked like a missing person –
“Demarco Brown”, I read and I saw my face on the paper. I stared at it until it flew further away. Rest was still a blur and I found myself outside our house.
I wanted to break down the door and ask Jayla about all this craziness. My frustrated banging just came off like a mild knock, which startled me. Unable to contain my frustration, when I was about to kick the door open, Jayla opens it.
My breath caught within, I look at her waiting for her to say something.
She looked at me and there was no emotion in her eyes. It is as if she looked right past me.
She stepped out and shut the grill door that went right through me!
The reality all of a sudden hit me in the gut.
I was a ghost.
Jayla poisoned me that night.
The lingering humanity in me diminished as all the love for her changed to hatred. I went through the door into the house. I sensed her presence in the bedroom at the first floor.
I climbed the stairs slowly taking my time, scheming twisted thoughts. I followed her voice humming a song and she was changing into a short black dress.
I stood right behind me as she combed her hair and then her eyes caught mine in the mirror.
“Finally, you see me darling”, I growled and devoured her screams with mine.